Culinary Criminals

Criminal Profiles

Jerian Tyo

Crimes:
Merciless Slaugter of Culinary Art
Irritating the Italians
Ankle Socks
Ketchup Overdose

Heng Sheui Huei

Crimes:
Merciless Slaugter of Culinary Art
Irritating the Italians
Insulting the Sorting Hat of Hogwarts

Kung Xin Ni

Crimes:
Merciless Slaugter of Culinary Art
Irritating the Italians
Not Singing her Primary School Song With Xiao Dan & Shi Min

Chan Shi Min

Crimes:
Merciless Slaugter of Culinary Art
Irritating the Italians

COURTROOM DRAMA

Prosecutor: Did you or did you not witness the merciless slaughter of a pizza during Language Arts?

Witness: No, it was more of a sadisti-

Prosecutor (Interrupts): Answer the question, and only the question.

Witness: Yes.

Prosecutor: Did the slaughterers express any signs of joy or happiness at the sight of the pizza's demise?

Witness: Yeah.

Prosecutor: Yes or no?

Witness (rolls eyes): Yes.

Prosecutor: Did the slaughterers stop their sadistic torment of the pizza when it begged for mercy?

Defendant: Irrelevant!

Prosecutor: Do you, as a girl, think Jerian is "cute"?

Witness: Yes.

Prosecutor: I rest my case.

Defendant: Jerian. Is. Not. "CUTE".

Prosecutor: Oh yes he is. He could win "Manhunt".

Defendant: Is not.

Prosecutor: Is too.

Defendant: Is NOT!

Prosecutor: Is TOO!

Judge: Order in the court. And get me a new hammer.

I dunno what the hell that was.

Today we had Dance. IT WAS HELL. I was stuck in this all girl group. Horrible. Lion Queen, Sidekick, Mei Wen and Norec. Eww. God help me. And our song was a sickly sweet Korean crime-against-humanity.

One night and one more time. Thanks for the memories, even though they weren’t so great. “He tastes like you, only sweeter.”

~Thnks Fr Th Mmrs by Fall Out Boy