I was emo-ing just a while ago. And I don't mean brooding-emoing. I must be pretty fun to watch when I'm emoing. I lie on my bed, blasting my ears. And I can feel the shit of my life almost physically bleed out of me as I writhe there. I basically look like a spaz psycho. But it works. So don't laugh too loud.
When I do that I also usually think. Like, big thoughts, whatever. Just realised about how I'm critcal about how everyone's not being honest but I am being a hypocrite too. Just more sutbly. Like as if the mask I was wearing has meld into me and now I don't even feel it. (Haiz. Even when I'm in a bad mood, I'm still a sucker for overdramatic poetry.) But it pretty much reflects what was going through my head.
Also sorted out why I'm not feelijng so good nowadays. She is FREAKING bittersweet. A double-edged sword. Whatever cliche you put in, it's true. I must be the guy that get that acidic feeling the most times in a day on earth. I'm amazed that I'm sticking through with it. Usually I know when to give up.
If this post doen't make sense, I don't blame you. I'm putting down thoughts I don't even feel anymore, even though I thought them just minutes ago. Cause when I emo it's like a high. (Ironic, huh? Emo/High) Like drug high. And I don't feel what I felt after the emotherapy.
You must be thinking I'm pretty unstable. But everyone has their demons, no matter how shallow/okay they look/are. Yiling said that. She's alot deeper than I thought. (Judge. Book. Cover.)
Realised that I'm rambling on and this post is turning out to be alot longer than I intended. Gonna end now. It felt good immortalising my emoness on the blog.
"We're the lifers
Until the bitter end.
Condemned from the start.
Ashamed of the way
The songs and the words own
The beating of our hearts."
~Sophomore Slump or Comback of the Year
by FOB
PS: (Since when did I do this?) Gonna finally type out a poem I wrote a long time ago next time I post. And maybe a bit more music critique.
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